Help your child do better in school? What mother would say no to that idea? Sure, most kids start off the school year happy and excited and full of bubbly spirits. They come home wanting to tell you all about the new friends they’ve made, the old friends with whom they’ve reunited, and how awesome their teachers are. The real question is: how can you keep the zest of these first few days fresh and alive throughout the year?
The truth is, you can’t. If you could, there wouldn’t be anything special about going back to school. It wouldn’t be the milestone that it is.
What you can do is provide the bridge between school and home for your child so that the two fit into your child’s life together seamlessly. Your child should feel real interest from you, as her parent, about her day at school, about her friends, and about her schoolwork. In this way, it’s as if you’re all part of one team: school, kids, parents, teachers, and home. You’re working together to educate your child and help her grow.
Help Your Child Do Better In School: Building A Bridge
It’s actually a lot easier than it sounds to build that bridge between home and school, and it can make all the difference in how well your child does in the classroom and in life. Here are ten ways you can help your child do better in school, because really—isn’t that what being a parent is all about?
1) Wake them up in a pleasant way: Let’s face it up, waking up is hard to do. Try to make the morning a “soft landing” for your child (as opposed to a rude awakening). Put on some soft mellow music, and if you don’t have time to cook a full breakfast, place a cinnamon stick in a pot of water, and let it simmer on the stove to fill the air with its spicy scent. It’s so much better waking up to nice sounds and smells than to panicked parental units urging kids to hurry up or they’ll miss the bus.
2) Kiss your child as he goes out the door: No matter how rushed you both are, take the time to kiss your child and remind him to, “Have a good day.” It makes a difference.
3) Develop a home coming ritual: In our home, each child has his own special drinking cup filled and waiting for him to come home from school. Next to each cup are two chocolate-filled wafers. Kids are always thirsty when they come home, and having something sweet all ready when they come through the door, makes children associate coming home, with sweetness. Your ritual can be anything you choose. The main thing is to stick to it. Homecoming rituals tell your child you think about him even when he’s not home. It tells him you missed him and you’re glad he came home. It tells him you care.
4) Give your child time to unwind and get comfy: Don’t pounce on your child with chores you want him to do, or demand he do homework immediately. Give him a chance to relax. Ask him what kind of day he had, and listen carefully to what he has to say. Relate to him. Let him have a drink, use the bathroom, and kick back a bit before you get into what he needs to do next.
5) Build homework into the homecoming routine: You don’t want to jump on your child to do homework as soon as he comes in the door (see #4 above). But you also don’t want to let him do whatever he wants the minute school is out. After he eats a snack and gets cozy, he should complete his homework before doing anything else, like going out to play, or spending time on the computer. Having a gap between schoolwork and homework is important. When a child does homework after that gap of time, he has to force his mind to think back to what he learned in school. This helps cement what he has learned that day into his long term memory bank. Skipping homework means losing ground.
6) Have a nutritious dinner: Make sure that dinner includes protein as well as complex carbohydrates. Kids need fuel for their brains and bodies to perform their best. That doesn’t mean that meals have to be boring. Plan ahead. Ask your child what he likes to eat, and accommodate his likes and dislikes if you can.
7) Warn your child that bedtime is coming: Kids find it hard to have to stop what they are doing, especially if they are having fun. But getting enough sleep is important. Letting him know that he has a half an hour, and then fifteen minutes, and then five minutes until bedtime, helps him get used to the idea, so he doesn’t find it so difficult to make the transition from leisure time to bedtime. You’ll have a lot fewer arguments along the lines of, “Just three more minutes. Please!” if you follow this advice.
8) Set up for the next day before going to sleep: Picking out what he will wear, and making sure he’s got what he needs for school all ready in his backpack, is making sure that the morning won’t be crazy hectic and out of control. The best way to start a day is knowing that everything is all ready and waiting.
9) Bedtime rituals are awesome: In some homes, bedtime means story time. Reading a story to your child is a wonderful way to end the day for both of you. It means being close and cuddling, and sharing something together. It means developing a love of words and text. When your child is a little older, you might want to suggest your child drop off to sleep reading a book on his own. If you foster a love of books in your child, he’ll never be lonely or bored. In some homes, music is part of the bedtime ritual. Playing some soft classical music at night will enrich your child’s dreams!
10) Time for YOU: Being a good parent and helping your child do well in school starts with feeling good about yourself. Have something in your life that is just for you. It doesn’t have to be something expensive. It can be a glass of wine and a bubble bath by candlelight. It can be a yoga class, or season tickets to the symphony. Whatever you do that makes you feel more alive, can only be good for you as a mom or a dad. We work hard at helping our children at home and at school, and we need time for ourselves, too.
During vacation we can all get a little lazy with our daily routines. The funny thing is, coming back to the routines along with the start of the school year, actually feels good.
And that’s exactly as it should be!
All of these tips are really just common sense. But we all need reminders here and there of the small and big things we must do to keep our children steady and secure. Being there and really listening to your child are two ways you not only help him in school, but also help him become a better, more fuller person, and a success in life.
Here’s to a brilliant start, and a productive year for all.
About Varda Epstein
Varda Meyers Epstein serves as editor in chief of Kars4Kids Parenting. A native of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, Varda is the mother of 12 children and is also a grandmother of 12. Her work has been published in The Washington Post, The Huffington Post, The Learning Site, The eLearning Site, and Internet4Classrooms.
Mrs Epstein, I apologize for not coming by sooner, but I will say that although I was very taken by you and your work, you are a very large Blessing for Our Circle, and we have been witness to many in the last year.
Sincerely,
Aida StrongBow
Senior Editor
http://notinmyworld.org
These are all great ideas. I never really developed a routine for homework, and as a result I feel like I could have done better in middle/high school. There was always an expectation to get your homework done as soon as you came home, but I preferred to have some time to stop thinking about school and relax before I did mine. It’s all about what your kid’s preferences are, honestly. Thanks for sharing these tips!
I hear you, but I think it’s more than kids’ preferences, it’s about the routine, we as parents, create for them. This instills good study/learning habits.